A Woman’s Way Through the Twelve Steps

 

The original words of the 12 Steps interpreted by women for women.

A focus on healing. 

A whole lot of Awesome

This compilation of a diverse group of real women’s voices and wisdom illuminates how women understand the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and offers inspiring stories of how they have traveled through the Steps and discovered what works for them. The book can be used alone or as a companion to The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous.

By drawing attention to how recovery raises special issues for women – from questions about sexuality and relationships to essential topics such as powerlessness, spirituality, and trauma – A Woman’s Way empowers women to take ownership of their recovery and to grow and flourish in sobriety.

Recovery is not a man’s world…

Recovery is not a man’s world, and yet to a woman, it can sometimes seem that way. Geared specifically to that woman, this book brings a feminine perspective to the Twelve Step program, searching out the healing messages beneath the male-oriented words. Based on an open exploration and a flexible interpretation of the Twelve Steps, this new perspective takes into account the psychological development of women as it relates to addiction and recovery, as well as the social and cultural factors that affect women in particular.

Acknowledging that recovery raises special issues for women–from questions about sexuality, relationships, and everyday life to anxieties about speaking up at mixed-gender meetings–A Woman’s Way through the Twelve Steps focuses directly on the feminine experience of addiction and healing. The author explores the Twelve Steps one by one, reiterating each in its traditional language, then explaining and illustrating it in a way that highlights a woman’s experience–empowering the reader to take ownership of her own recovery process as well as her growth as a woman.

What’s Included?

Exclusive Content

Using tested materials with Lynn’s professional and personal guidance. 

Supportive Community

Join The SoberSoul Recovery Lounge open exclusively to Lynn’s online students. 

Video Training

Lynn personalizes each step with a video lesson. 

Actionable Strategies

Although not required, you will get much more out of the class by using Stephanie Covington’s book and/or workbook.

Awesome Ideas

For those who may be “turned off” by the traditional 12-Steps.

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Discounts at Completion

Upon completion of the course, you will receive special discounts for other SoberSoul Recovery offerings. 

Super support in our Community

After you join the masterclass, you will receive an invitation to the private Facebook group for Lynn’s online students, The SoberSoul Recovery Lounge.  Here I offer live weekly Q & A’s for when questions arise. 

Your Investment

The first questions that went through my mind when questioning my drinking and pill use (over the counter and prescription-not as directed) were:

 

Why can’t I just do this on my own?

Most of us try and try again the approach of “doing this on my own”.  The problem is that it goes against our basic human nature of connecting with others to support us.  Think about how much you enjoy helping someone else. You are not a failure because you haven’t been able to stop drinking or using on your own. This isn’t about a lack of willpower or the collapse of your determination. Part of your brain has literally been hijacked, That’s the physical side that most “easy fix” gurus and coaches get wrong. The other significant issue that goes unaddressed is why we start numbing ourselves in the first place.  These issues cannot be dealt with by learning one or two skills, it takes a program to shift your mind and heal your brain. 

What if I don’t like the whole AA/NA “thing”?

Beautiful Boy author David Sheff’s important new book, Clean, takes AA to task for the failings of some of its adherents and its undue influence on US addiction treatment. Yet he acknowledges that the program started by a soused stockbroker has saved millions of lives. Why is that? Sheff—writes, “researchers discovered that Bill Wilson unwittingly designed and implemented contingency-management, CBT, and group therapies that would prove to be valid evidence-based treatments.” (CBT and the 12 Steps Have a Lot in Common, Fix, By Alexis Stein, The Fix 04/19/13).    So consider this…The Steps are similar to cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), which focuses on helping someone change his or her dysfunctional emotions, behaviors or thoughts through goal-oriented, specific exercises. CBT is used primarily to treat patients struggling with mood disorders, depression, anxiety, substance abuse, and personality disorders.

Why should I spend money on this? 

Cost of Buying Your Drug of Choice.
If you have a substance addiction, paying for it can get expensive, regardless of the substance. Even something that can be cheap, such as alcohol, can drain your bank account over time, especially if you find you need to use more to get your desired effect. Because your tolerance will increase, it’s a scientific fact.

To put this into perspective, if you drink a cheap $5 6-pack of beer every day, that’s $150 each month. That’s almost $1,000 in 6 months to support this habit.

Now switch out the $5 beer to a more expensive bottle of wine or a drug like, cocaine or heroin and the cost skyrockets. Some people can easily spend more than $10,000 each year to support their addiction.

Loss of Productivity and Income
Abusing your drug (yep, that includes alcohol and pot) can make you significantly less productive. You may start to notice that you’re calling in sick to work more often and when you do make an appearance, the quality of your work is very sub par. Poor work performance can mean you miss out on promotions or bonuses, a cut back on shifts, or you could even lose your job.

Many people eventually lose their jobs and remain unemployed as a result of their addiction. I quit one of mine, which counts for losing it. Many of us end up in jails, prisons, or long-term rehabilitation facilities, which can result in years of lost productivity. It can be difficult to get yourself back in the workforce after years of unemployment. 

Over a lifetime, addiction can cost an addict thousands of dollars in lost productivity potential. Even if you “only” drink or use on weekends, it is like a slowly dripping faucet. 

Health Care, Insurance Costs, and Legal Fees

Relying on alcohol or another drug to cope with life can result in serious health problems. This is already a huge and life-threatening cost, however, it inevitably comes with increased health care fees, especially if you are avoiding going to the doctor.

Another cost that may often be overlooked, is the increase in car insurance premiums and fines you incur as a result of your use. Getting arrested for driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol may result in a 300% increase in your car insurance premiums, significant legal fees, and let’s not forget jail time.

Other payments you may need to make include fees for attorney services, educational courses, and drug-related fines.

The Costs of Addiction on Society

The costs of addiction on society are extremely high. Drug addiction costs society billions of dollars in health care expenditures, enforcement of drug laws, lost productivity, etc.

 According to research, excessive drinking alone cost the United States approximately $223 billion dollars in health care expenses, law enforcement costs, and lost productivity in 2006. In 2007, similar problems relating to illicit drug use cost the country another $193 billion dollars.

 

Course Content

Week 1

Introduction:  In A Woman’s Way through the Twelve Steps sessions, we will work to create a safe, caring environment that is based on mutual support and growing personal power. These sessions are designed to help you interpret the Twelve Steps in ways that are meaningful and useful to you. In short, this program is intended to supplement your Twelve Step work by providing a supportive, woman-centered experience that makes it easier for you to work the Steps.

Week 2

Step One:  The first step in recovery is to look inside ourselves. Turning inward is the beginning of becoming more truthful with ourselves. Honesty is essential because addictions thrive on dishonesty: we have become accustomed to hiding from our true feelings and values. (p. 15)

Week 3

Step 2:  What can we believe in? Whom can we trust? The problem is that life is more difficult and empty without someone or something to trust and believe in. (p. 27)

Week 4

Step 3:  Of course, simple things aren’t always easy. This Step says we turn our will over. When we cling to our will – our fierce determination that things should always go our way – we’ll always be in conflict with something. Our willfulness keeps us pushing against, not flowing with life. (p. 51)

Week 5

Step 4:  When we carry intense guilt, we can hardly bear the thought of reviewing our past deeds. It may feel too painful to think about how we have hurt others and hurt ourselves. We may question the value of opening old wounds and remembering scenes we’d rather forget. It was a revelation to discover that Step Four wasn’t just about agonizing about the past. Instead, it was about getting to know myself better. (p. 59)

Week 6

Step 5:  The Fifth Step offers healing. It shows us how to create a new kind of relationship with people. We make ourselves vulnerable and open, allowing ourselves to be seen for who we really are, maybe for the first time. (p. 93)

Week 7

Step 6:  In this Step, we become willing to be open to change, willing to let go of habits or traits that cause our lives to be unbalanced. We become open to a deeper knowing and a clearer vision. (p. 95)

Week 8

Step 7:  But for all of our awareness, we may still not accept ourselves. Step Seven gives us the opportunity to move from self-awareness to self-acceptance. Acceptance is the key to change. Another paradox I have learned in recovery is that when I accept myself just as I am, I can change. (p. 120)

Week 9

Step 6:  In this Step, we become willing to be open to change, willing to let go of habits or traits that cause our lives to be unbalanced. We become open to a deeper knowing and a clearer vision. (p. 95)

Week 10

Step 9:  What does it mean to make amends to another person? It means taking responsibility for your part in a relationship. Responsibility refers to the ability to respond appropriately. When you do, you extend hope for something new to yourself and to another person. (p. 137)

Week 11

Step 10:  Now we make a daily commitment to continuing observation and reflection – recognizing when we’re out of balance or hurting ourselves or others. Our ongoing awareness allows us to meet each day and each relationship with responsibility. (p. 152)

Week 12

Step 11:  We can choose whatever practice gives us a sense of inner peace. (p. 173)

Week 13

Step 12:  With recovery, this can mean that we offer a straightforward explanation of the Twelve Steps, as well as our own personal experience – how we reworked, translated, revised, or otherwise molded the Steps until they were relevant to us. We all have more to offer than the party line and a by-the-book recitation of the Steps. We can share our story any way we like. (p. 188)

Week 14

A Step Beyond:  Before recovery, many of us never had a guide to turn to when our lives became difficult.  After working the Twelve Steps to heal from addiction, we discover we can take what we have learned and apply it to something beyond drinking or using. Having developed the inner resources to cope with our addictions allows us to change many other aspects of our lives in a way that we can feel. (p. 191)

Your Investment

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